Q&A: Clue me up On Cappy men-I'm stumped?

Question by jodestar1000: Clue me up On Cappy men-I'm stumped?
This is wordy-so please bare with it.
Met a Cappy in February 2008 (at work)-started dating in late May (our relationship stayed out of the work/gossip treadmill).I'm Leo/Virgo cusp with Scorpio rising. Don't know a great deal other than born 9 Jan 1963-during a solar eclipse. He's a widower-his partner died x-mas eve just passed (2007). He got a guilt attack and felt that it was too soon for us to date-but that a part of him just wasn't willing to give up on us. I said that until he got himself sorted we should part, at first he agreed and we agreed to part friends which lasted a week, then he showed up on my door-step and made it clear he WOULD not give up and that we SHOULD be together. So we tried. We had some difficulties and admittedly I over-reacted when he did the Cappy-no contact thing. But, we seemed to get past it. Then all of a sudden he disappeared completely (late July). I waited a few weeks and then called, he was super-friendly, but I felt like he was stringing me along. I didn't accuse him of it-but instead said "you've made it clear that you've lost interest", he waivered and could neither confirm or deny (late August).So we became sort-of-friends. In October, I found out that he was now bonk-buddies with a woman in my department-heard it from her (this guy ‘choosing’ her over me is like choosing a month-old, half eaten pizza that you found in the trash over a freshly prepared roast with all the trimmings).He showed up on my doorstep the next evening, we chatted for about 3 hours, bonk-buddy subject was not bought up. We started IMing each other (very infrequently), and stayed in contact outside of work that way. We had virtually no contact at work (once upon a time he was running into me around every corner-in a building with 25 floors-any of which I could be on at no particular given time). In early November I resigned-as I had a new job, I was yet to tell him-when-I find out that apart from the bonk-buddy (that he’s till bonking)-he ‘tree trunked’ (apparently) about 30 women since his wife died (he'd been talking himself up in the office to the gossip queen).I IMed and told him to delete my number, I then sent him a cutting message-I made it clear that I knew about the bonk-buddy, and couldn't care less....but finding out that he'd disrespected his dead wife and (living) daughters by having so many sexual partners coming and going AND bragging about it-was DISGUSTING. He never replied to this message.
I know that Cappys a big on planning-and this whole issue was no accident-both girls (at workplace) are HUGE gossipers and the bonk buddy is LOUD and renowned as being vitriolic when crossed. There is no doubt in my mind that he planned on being caught AND having

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